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Negotiating Monogamy

By DNGG One of my biggest pet peeves is listening to people talk about other people’s sheep-like tendencies or “privilege” while failing to acknowledge their own. Recently, there’s been a lot of talk...

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Behind the Veil

Unraveling My Own Personal Identity Crisis By DNGG I am having an identity crisis….there I’ve said it. Recently, there’s been a lot going on in my life; there’s my academic obligations, some growing...

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A Disquieting Silence

The National Coalition for Sexual Freedom (NCSF) is currently promoting a program called “Consent Counts.” Numerous classes on negotiation, boundaries, and safety practices are taught each year at kink...

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Giving Sex Work a Voice

By DNGG Give the people a voice and they will tell their stories. Cultural Studies scholars have long argued the political and social importance of minority and oppressed groups to be heard. Recent...

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A Mono Girl’s Guide to Dating Poly People

With an onslaught of books, articles, and websites dealing with non-monogamy and poly relationships, more people seem to be giving “alternate relationship structures” a try. Books, such as Opening Up...

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An Object Lesson: Objectifying Kink

In William Shakespeare’s The Merchant of Venice, Shylock muses “If you prick us do we not bleed? If you tickle us, do we not laugh? If you poison us, do we not die?” after being mocked and derided for...

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Giving Kink a Black Eye

WARNING…WARNING!!! I’m going to talk about race and I’m likely to say a few things some of you may not want to hear. As much as American society likes to claim we’re moving or have already moved into a...

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Going Rogue: Dragging Kink Into the Shadows

Often those that participate in kink, BDSM, and alternative lifestyles like to think of themselves as social outlaws, people that live and love on the edge. They view themselves as renegades and...

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The Culture of Radical Sex?

In 1994, Pat Califia committed her thoughts on gender, sexuality, censorship, kink, prostitution, safer sex, and leather to print in a book titled Public Sex: The Culture of Radical Sex. As an...

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But I AM Communicating!

We’ve all learned the secret to good, successful relationships by now, right? Communicate, communicate, communicate! It’s one of the favorite mantras of relationship counselors the world over. Whether...

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Lies We Tell Ourselves

Self-Deception in the Postmodern Age By DNGG Studies have shown that the average person lies several times a day. Sometime the lies are little untruths - “That new haircut looks great.” Other times...

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Leather Women

When asked about “leather culture,” one might conjure up images of black leather jackets, motorcycle clubs, strict hierarchies, and ultra-masculine men. In the world of kink, “leather” and “leather...

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Negotiating Monogamy

By DNGG One of my biggest pet peeves is listening to people talk about other people’s sheep-like tendencies or “privilege” while failing to acknowledge their own. Recently, there’s been a lot of talk...

View Article


BDSM in Mainstream Media

The popularity of Fifty Shades of Grey has catapulted BDSM into the mainstream for a new generation, but E.L. James’ bestselling erotic novel is far from the first time kink has made its way into...

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Queer as Who? : Defining Queerness

By DNGG Many years ago, as a bright-eyed and optimistic undergraduate college student, I attempted to join my university’s LBGTQ (Lesbian, Bisexual, Gay, Transgendered, and Queer) organization. Notice...

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An Object Lesson: Objectifying Kink

In William Shakespeare’s The Merchant of Venice, Shylock muses “If you prick us do we not bleed? If you tickle us, do we not laugh? If you poison us, do we not die?” after being mocked and derided for...

View Article

Giving Kink a Black Eye

WARNING…WARNING!!! I’m going to talk about race and I’m likely to say a few things some of you may not want to hear. As much as American society likes to claim we’re moving or have already moved into a...

View Article


Going Rogue: Dragging Kink Into the Shadows

Often those that participate in kink, BDSM, and alternative lifestyles like to think of themselves as social outlaws, people that live and love on the edge. They view themselves as renegades and...

View Article

The Culture of Radical Sex?

In 1994, Pat Califia committed her thoughts on gender, sexuality, censorship, kink, prostitution, safer sex, and leather to print in a book titled Public Sex: The Culture of Radical Sex. As an...

View Article

But I AM Communicating!

We’ve all learned the secret to good, successful relationships by now, right? Communicate, communicate, communicate! It’s one of the favorite mantras of relationship counselors the world over. Whether...

View Article
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